NUVA the ring of Death? BETA Testing Now
Once a month birth control–just a dream, right? Wrong. The NuvaRing is now available (like not in beta testing) for everyone. At least for anyone female. Any gynocologist or clinic physician will happily prescribe the new ultra low estrogen NuvaRing for you!
The NuvaRing is about 2 inches and looks like a toddler’s teething ring, the kind you stick in the fridge. In fact you can stick the NuvaRing in the fridge for up to 3 hours (for whatever reason, ie sexual activity ((which is optional BTW)), just for the hell of it, gyno. examination, etc..), without fear of pregnancy.
Basically, pinch the NuvaRing together (it’s flexible) and push it to the far end of the vagina where it is stopped in place by the cervix. And, no, the ring cannot slip any farther beyond the cervix and become ‘lost’, ladies. The NuvaRing sits there for exactly one month’s time. Throughout the month estrogen is magically released from within the ring. At month’s end the NuvaRing is taken out and disposed of for a ring-free week of menstruation. whoo-who?
Pros: Only having to think about it once a month. O Really? Cons: Everything. Yes Really.
The NuvaRing sounds like a good idea–too good. You could be one of the lucky few (or the many?) that are allergic to the NuvaRing. Unfortunately, there’s no way to tell before hand if you’ll have an adverse reaction to the ring. That would be too easy, too safe. The ring’s plastic is allegedly hypo allergenic, but who knows?
Allergic reactions range from pain on the left side of the body, nausea, eye sight problems, vomiting, fainting, frequent bathroom trip of the embarassing and horrible kind. In short, pain. And of course if any of the above happens to you, it is a smart idea to discontinue using the NuvaRing ASAP. Duh.
Also, the NuvaRing could cause behavioral side affects. My girl friend (on the side) reported being extremely angry while on it. So much so that slightly annoying things, like foot tapping, made her completely, irrationally angry. Pissed off women are easy enough to come by without this shit. The last thing you want is your big breasted lover P.O.'d phone in hand, dialing the wife.
Okay, so maybe you’re not allergic to the NuvaRing and have survived without passing out in the woods or going to anger management classes, but you do have a very high chance of developing a yeast infection. I am not talking the one pill three day kind. And it’s not just women who are susceptible to infections, women who never had an infection are developing them with continued NuvaRing use.
The idea of a once a month birth control that you can’t feel or don’t have to worry about appeals to many ladies out there. The NuvaRing is also being heavily pushed as the new substitute for Ortho Evra, AKA the killer patch. Joking aside, the patch kills (too much estrogen) and maybe the NuvaRing does, too? I guess we won’t find out for sure for a couple more months. After all the NuvaRing still is in beta testing.
For my money this baby is 9 thumbs down. Pass me the Linux patch please.
The NuvaRing is about 2 inches and looks like a toddler’s teething ring, the kind you stick in the fridge. In fact you can stick the NuvaRing in the fridge for up to 3 hours (for whatever reason, ie sexual activity ((which is optional BTW)), just for the hell of it, gyno. examination, etc..), without fear of pregnancy.
Basically, pinch the NuvaRing together (it’s flexible) and push it to the far end of the vagina where it is stopped in place by the cervix. And, no, the ring cannot slip any farther beyond the cervix and become ‘lost’, ladies. The NuvaRing sits there for exactly one month’s time. Throughout the month estrogen is magically released from within the ring. At month’s end the NuvaRing is taken out and disposed of for a ring-free week of menstruation. whoo-who?
Pros: Only having to think about it once a month. O Really? Cons: Everything. Yes Really.
The NuvaRing sounds like a good idea–too good. You could be one of the lucky few (or the many?) that are allergic to the NuvaRing. Unfortunately, there’s no way to tell before hand if you’ll have an adverse reaction to the ring. That would be too easy, too safe. The ring’s plastic is allegedly hypo allergenic, but who knows?
Allergic reactions range from pain on the left side of the body, nausea, eye sight problems, vomiting, fainting, frequent bathroom trip of the embarassing and horrible kind. In short, pain. And of course if any of the above happens to you, it is a smart idea to discontinue using the NuvaRing ASAP. Duh.
Also, the NuvaRing could cause behavioral side affects. My girl friend (on the side) reported being extremely angry while on it. So much so that slightly annoying things, like foot tapping, made her completely, irrationally angry. Pissed off women are easy enough to come by without this shit. The last thing you want is your big breasted lover P.O.'d phone in hand, dialing the wife.
Okay, so maybe you’re not allergic to the NuvaRing and have survived without passing out in the woods or going to anger management classes, but you do have a very high chance of developing a yeast infection. I am not talking the one pill three day kind. And it’s not just women who are susceptible to infections, women who never had an infection are developing them with continued NuvaRing use.
The idea of a once a month birth control that you can’t feel or don’t have to worry about appeals to many ladies out there. The NuvaRing is also being heavily pushed as the new substitute for Ortho Evra, AKA the killer patch. Joking aside, the patch kills (too much estrogen) and maybe the NuvaRing does, too? I guess we won’t find out for sure for a couple more months. After all the NuvaRing still is in beta testing.
For my money this baby is 9 thumbs down. Pass me the Linux patch please.
posted by The Last Word | 12:51 AM
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